From the Movie Snob.

Underworld. (C-) I can say with a great deal of certainty that this is the loudest movie I have ever seen. Not that I expect a movie about the centuries-old war between vampires and werewolves to be quiet and peaceful, mind you, but during the fight scenes the director turns the volume up to 11. By the end, I was covering my ears to avoid discomfort. The heavy-metal soundtrack, or whatever the kids call this non-musical noise these days, added to the painfulness. Anyhoo, the movie itself was pretty lackluster. The movie frequently grinds to a halt to allow various characters to give expository monologues about the origins of the war and the current goings-on in the vampire and werewolf camps. Kate Beckinsale shoots for "tough and ruthless" but comes off mainly as "cute" as the spunky vampire Celine, a professional werewolf-killer who would rather be out pumping the enemy full of silver bullets than dealing with her effete and decadent kin back at Creepy Vampire Mansion. Since she's only about a third as large as anyone else in the movie, I thought the moviemakers wisely opted to minimize her participation in the frequent bone-crunching fights between blood-suckers and shape-changers. Bottom line: this one's for hardcore vampire and/or werewolf fans only.