10,000 B.C.

Nick at Nite pans a new DVD.

10,000 B.C.

This is the worst movie I have ever seen. This is saying a lot because I see a ton of bad movies. I don’t even know where to begin. I do have this question. Why is it that some of the characters in this movie speak the king’s English and others must speak in their native tongue with the requisite subtitles? When the story is already such a huge stretch why not just let them all speak the king’s English? Anyways this movie is Apocalypto. Seriously. It is the same story. Bad dudes come to village. They kill some villagers and take others. One who is left behind goes to rescue the villages and his girlfriend. There are some subtle differences and the movie does feature some cool woolly mammoths, but it basically the same movie. I don’t even know why I watched this. It was just terrible. I would rather watch Ishtar ten times. I would rather watch Mariah Carey in a movie. Our perhaps another Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck vehicle. I give this movie an “F.” I wish the grade could be lower.