Birthday Girl. (C-) I have been known to say that I would pay money to see a movie consisting of nothing but Nicole Kidman reading from a telephone book. After watching this DVD rental, I almost felt like I had accomplished that goal. This is a lame little movie about a British guy who orders a Russian mail-order bride. He is a pathetic fellow with a dead-end job at a bank and an interest in kinky pornography. She, of course, turns out to be Nicole Kidman. Then two thuggish Russian guys show up on the doorstep, and the plot veers from uninteresting pseudo-romance to uninteresting I don't know what. Crime caper? Action movie? On the other hand, Kidman's phenomenal good looks, even in trashy poor-Russian-girl attire, make up for a lot of weak plot and characterization. On the whole, this movie is for diehard Kidman fans only.

Incidentally, the DVD contains almost no special features, but it does have a random music video by some guy I've never heard of named Robbie Williams doing a duet of "Somethin' Stupid" with -- Nicole Kidman. I suppose her singing is competent, and she looks stunning, but what is it doing on this DVD???